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Scott Baio

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A Scythe for Sore Eyes


Remember the guy in high school who drove the clapped-out rat rodthat looked like hell but went like stink? Everyone made fun of his rust bucket, but only because they were jealous that he got to drive it while they could only look at it. We imagine he's the guy who would buy the Galpin Auto SportsScythe if he hit the lottery. We're sure Beau Boeckmann's crew at GAS were specifically commissioned to build a vehicle with two steering wheels, 1,005 horsepower and a face like a cicada. We can't imagine any other reason an ordinarily top-tier custom shop would create such so hideous a monster. After all, these are the folks who bring you the custom-for-custom's sake reinterpretations seen on Pimp My Ride. "With Scythe, we set out to showcase all of our unique fabrication abilities here at GAS," Boeckmann said in press release. "From the handmade composite body and voice-activated on-board computer system to the twin-supercharged 1,005 horsepower engine, this car was built to make a statement." That statement is "We turned a 2008 Mustang GT convertible into a 1994 Hot Wheelsreject." Boechmann unveiled the Scythe at a big charity event that featured more B-, C- and D-List celebs than an episode of I Love the 90's. Heck, even Mark McGrath and Scott Baio were there. We hope proceeds went to the AMC Gremlin Memorial Foundation for Terminally Unattractive Cars. Beyond not having to look at the exterior of the car, the driver of the Scythe will find pleasantries like a voice-activated Shuttle XPCcomputer that, connected to a 3-G network, provides real-time traffic, news and weather updates. Flush-mounted exterior security cameras will capture the horrified stares of passersby and the howls of crying children losing control of their bodily functions. It's really a pity that GAS decided to pour so much effort into a car that makes the Elephant Man look like Brad Pitt because it's got some amazing engineering under that ugly skin. The twin Magnuson supercharged 5.0-liter engine? Custom built by GAS. The Air Ride Technologies suspension with computer-adjustable ride height? A GAS original. With dual automatically-retracting steering wheels, the Scythe is even configurable for right- and left-hand drive should drivers want to terrify the British or use it to deliver mail. While we wouldn't turn down the chance to drive the Scythe -- 1,005 horsepower is, after all, 1,005 horsepower -- we have to say it is seriouslyugly. All that technology doesn't make up for the fact that looks like just the perfect child-terrifying cross between a Dirt Devil and an earwig. Photos courtesy Galpin Auto Sports. Sorry, guys ...
Published: Tue, 11 Nov 2008 11:55:28 GMT - Source: Blog.Wired.Com - Read the article

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